Box Sale

We’re back!!!! We know it has been quite a while since our last post and many of you probably thought we were face down in a road-side ditch; but alas, we’re alive and well. So, to answer the million dollar question of what happened? Life happened. She got busy, He got busy and our blog got lost, kind of like a leash-less kid at Disney. However, the good news is that the blog is no longer lost in the hustle and now we’re letting you know “the blog is back,” in our best Rick Ross voice.  We have truly missed our faithful followers/readers and just want to reiterate how much we appreciate you and your support.

For those new to the blog or those who need a refresher because it has been so long you’ve forgotten the setup, please allow us to explain. As you very well may know, opinions on relationships are like germs: you know everyone has 'em, but you'd prefer that they keep those opinions to themselves. Part of the problem with relationship advice is that it often comes from unreliable sources. For instance, either the advice-giver has been married (and divorced) multiple times or is single and hasn’t been on a date in years. Or, the advice comes from the view of one-sex which, unless you’re in a same-sex relationship, may not be all that helpful. If you’re a woman, taking advice from another woman about dealing with men is like taking advice from Mitt Romney on how to deal with poor people. Not advisable. And if you’re a man, the advice you get from your boys will likely lead you right down the path to baby mama drama because you followed the stick and move approach to relationships. Not a good look. With that in mind, we believe that the best relationship advice provides insight from both perspectives because it’s only together that a reasonable and rational conclusion may be reached; so, here we are.

Now, let us make it abundantly clear that these are our thoughts based solely upon our years of experience with family, friends and our personal love affairs. We aren’t being compensated for this, and we definitely haven’t researched this stuff, so use this information for your benefit (or at your own peril) and feel free to do what you please with our germs...we mean advice. So now, without further delay, let’s get back to business! 

As we thought about our first post out of retirement, we decided that we needed to address a topic that has been on our minds for quite some time; that topic is “Boxes for Sale”. Yeah, we said it and yeah we mean it because this is getting out of control. It has occurred to us via our immense studies, and by studies we mean extensive reviews of our Twitter Timelines and Facebook Feeds, that many women are pricing the box; otherwise known as the lady parts. What do we mean by that? Well, we’re glad you asked.  As of late, there has been much discussion about the growing number of women setting minimum dollar amounts and imposing requirements men must satisfy in order to access the box. For example, in order to get the goods, some women are requiring $200-$2,000 dates, a man who drives a luxury vehicle, or a man who makes “x” amount of dollars. And if he doesn’t drop this dough or meet these requirements, his access to the box is DENIED. Well, herein lies the numerous problems with this mindset.

Ladies, we both recognize and acknowledge that women are valuable and so are your/our goods; therefore, they shouldn’t be freely given away to every Tom, Dick, Harry, Malik or Juan who wants them. However, once access to “the box” comes with financial prerequisites and minimum spending price tags, it takes on a whole new dimension. In some ways, if you adopt this paradigm, you might as well attach a “For Sale” sign to your Victoria Secret’s and a barcode on your box because you’ve just made yourself a product. Once you’ve assigned a dollar amount, prerequisite, or minimum bidding price to your time, talents and tatas, things change.

He says: the price tag makes you a whore. Yes, a whore. Whores charge for their services and once you start imposing mandatory minimums, you enter into the world of the high-priced harlot. Money changes things. The difference between Burger King and a soup kitchen, a homeless shelter and a hotel, a woman and a whore is the exchange of money. If you start pricing the box, don’t be surprised when your customer(s) begins to treat your interactions less like mutual agreements to spend quality time together and more like strict financial transactions. In the financial sector, we operate under the theory of supply and demand; a concept that can be applied to “selling the box”.  For example, if your customer no longer believes your box supply is worth the money he’s shelling out and that there is a more affordable or even better price and product, don’t be surprised if he severs the relationship.  Now, if you don’t want a relationship and don’t mind being likened to a “high priced heaux”, then it’s all good baby girl, do what you do.  However, based upon my observations and experiences, most women want a relationship. If this is in fact your goal, selling your box to the highest bidder does not facilitate this process. In fact, it does the opposite. As a man, I’m just saying.

She says: this concept of pricing the box is ridiculous and needs to quickly go the way of the Dodo (extinction).  In no way do I advocate you just giving up the goods to anyone who wants them, asks for them, or tries to sweet talk you into the sheets. However, if that’s the way you want to get down, I fully support it; just protect yourself. Yet, I cannot understand the concept of only giving the goods to a man who spends no less than $200 on a date, drives a luxury car or has “that good government job”.  Luckily, I’ve never met anyone who actively engages in this line of thought because if I did, my first question would be “Bish are you crazy?!?”  For starters, what about a man spending $200 on a date makes him worthy of getting your goods? Are you only worth $200? If so, your snatch can’t be all that good if all it’s worth is a dinner at Morton’s. Also, is it really that easy for you to just give it up based on a man’s possession of material things? I’m going to step out on a limb and say that his dropping $200 on a date, while carting you around in a S Class Mercedes and telling you that he works on Capitol Hill doesn’t make him any worthier of your lovin’ and that it surely doesn’t somehow make him great boyfriend or husband material. In fact, there’s a great likelihood that he’s a complete douchebag who doesn’t value you and could care less about making you his girlfriend let alone his wife. So, if you want long term-why even bother? If you want to get some, get some, but don’t put a price tag on it because that’s just ridiculous. 

As you can see, we firmly believe that women with these “box accessibility requirements” really need to get over themselves. This is a ridiculous concept that is not going to go over well with most men you will be interested in. However, if this is how you choose to live your life, God speed and let us know how it works out.  But, for what it’s worth, thanks for giving us a great topic of discussionJ! Til we meet again, wrap it up, keep it tight and behave yourselves!